Comments on: Why I Avoid Negative People Like The Plague http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/ An Appetite For Life Wed, 08 Feb 2012 01:54:18 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.2 By: Vulcanmind http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-93077 Vulcanmind Mon, 11 May 2009 04:54:41 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-93077 Dude, I agree that dopey optimism is for the birds, but I think it's time that you understood that you cannot evaluate women by a male yardstick. I learned that the hard way, but I DID learn. I learned because I love women, and it took patience and a big dose of humility to find - and keep - MY woman. If there are gold-digging women, there are also some pretty valid ones on the face of this planet. Issuing a blanket condemnation against the entire genus is sort of like shooting yourself in the foot rather than improving your focus and taking better aim at the target that has apparently eluded you for so long - a woman who wants you for what you are, not for what you have or what you showcase yourself to be to begin with (always an unsustainable illusion). One swallow does not make a summer - and one vulture does not make Tombstone. Get your face off the Wailing Wall and open your mind to the fact that this world is big enough to accommodate a lot of imperfection - yours, and that of the woman/women who have seemingly convinced you of the virtues of eternal bachelorhood. There is still a chance for you - but not in the corner you are so industriously painting yourself into. Dude, I agree that dopey optimism is for the birds, but I think it’s time that you understood that you cannot evaluate women by a male yardstick. I learned that the hard way, but I DID learn. I learned because I love women, and it took patience and a big dose of humility to find - and keep - MY woman.

If there are gold-digging women, there are also some pretty valid ones on the face of this planet. Issuing a blanket condemnation against the entire genus is sort of like shooting yourself in the foot rather than improving your focus and taking better aim at the target that has apparently eluded you for so long - a woman who wants you for what you are, not for what you have or what you showcase yourself to be to begin with (always an unsustainable illusion).

One swallow does not make a summer - and one vulture does not make Tombstone. Get your face off the Wailing Wall and open your mind to the fact that this world is big enough to accommodate a lot of imperfection - yours, and that of the woman/women who have seemingly convinced you of the virtues of eternal bachelorhood. There is still a chance for you - but not in the corner you are so industriously painting yourself into.

]]> By: Ryan http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-93002 Ryan Sat, 09 May 2009 19:54:22 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-93002 This advice is total BS like most advices on the net. I agree that overall negativity is bad. But negative people have a logic behind what they say. Try evaluating the facts before u dismiss anything. Try to analyze what u are gaining or loosing with the situation u r in. For example, see all the divorced men aka deadbeat dads. Had they been negative they wouldn't have lost their lives with no fault of their own. But what did them was their optimism. All along they got played by an evil bitch and got screwed in the divorce. Its not funny. But if u would have tried to show them the light when they were on the altar about to speak those dreaded words would they have listened?? The typical answer is "Don't worry!! my wife is different.". Fucking Hell she was. She didn't even wait till the honeymoon was over before dialing the cops for some false DV case. That guy lost his home which he paid for with his hard-work. In that same house that cunt lives with a new drug dealer. She had turned it into a coke warehouse. I don't thing this is a funny situation to be in. I am a man and I am generally optimistic. But I am negative to the last bone when it comes to women, dating, relationships and marriage. The payoff is I still have my life together and have never been conned by a gold digger like most of my friends have been ranging from a quick meal scam to a full nightmarish divorce. I have a moderately successful business which earns me enough to take care of myself and my needs. I live my life with peace and serenity and run my business with a general positive approach. So, being blindly optimistic about everything in life is a recipe for disaster. U need to choose ur battles wisely. Thats all I can say. This advice is total BS like most advices on the net.
I agree that overall negativity is bad. But negative people have a logic behind what they say. Try evaluating the facts before u dismiss anything. Try to analyze what u are gaining or loosing with the situation u r in.
For example, see all the divorced men aka deadbeat dads. Had they been negative they wouldn’t have lost their lives with no fault of their own. But what did them was their optimism. All along they got played by an evil bitch and got screwed in the divorce. Its not funny. But if u would have tried to show them the light when they were on the altar about to speak those dreaded words would they have listened?? The typical answer is “Don’t worry!! my wife is different.”. Fucking Hell she was. She didn’t even wait till the honeymoon was over before dialing the cops for some false DV case. That guy lost his home which he paid for with his hard-work. In that same house that cunt lives with a new drug dealer. She had turned it into a coke warehouse.
I don’t thing this is a funny situation to be in. I am a man and I am generally optimistic. But I am negative to the last bone when it comes to women, dating, relationships and marriage. The payoff is I still have my life together and have never been conned by a gold digger like most of my friends have been ranging from a quick meal scam to a full nightmarish divorce. I have a moderately successful business which earns me enough to take care of myself and my needs. I live my life with peace and serenity and run my business with a general positive approach.
So, being blindly optimistic about everything in life is a recipe for disaster. U need to choose ur battles wisely. Thats all I can say.

]]> By: atlem http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-91875 atlem Fri, 24 Apr 2009 10:15:13 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-91875 I am a housewife and have been going through some traumatic experiences for a couple of years now. I've been judged and humiliated by some people in our neighborhood particularly the relatives of my husband. They're trying to put us down, me and my husband. I've been good to them and have been passive before but I eventually avoided them because they're trying to run our lives their way. I just don't want to be associated with them again for what they've done to us. I am a housewife and have been going through some traumatic experiences for a couple of years now. I’ve been judged and humiliated by some people in our neighborhood particularly the relatives of my husband. They’re trying to put us down, me and my husband. I’ve been good to them and have been passive before but I eventually avoided them because they’re trying to run our lives their way. I just don’t want to be associated with them again for what they’ve done to us.

]]> By: Anon http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-73134 Anon Mon, 10 Nov 2008 23:37:45 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-73134 Hey I can totally relate to Mary, i too had become very negative due to many traumatic experiences starting from when i was a kid, id always think of the bad or the worst that could happen in a situation. Hey

I can totally relate to Mary, i too had become very negative due to many traumatic experiences starting from when i was a kid, id always think of the bad or the worst that could happen in a situation.

]]> By: Dan Hinkley http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-71719 Dan Hinkley Wed, 01 Oct 2008 06:43:27 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-71719 Perhaps you are confusing mean people with negative people. Let's face it, pick up a history book, human history has been filled with war, famine, disease and death, as well as joy, love, success, honor and happiness. Still, given the brutality of nature (try living in nature for one month in the winter), it only stand to reason that one has to be a realist to survive. What you are talking about is an unhealthy focus on what is not real. It is reality that if you go to war you may die. It is not reality that driving around without your seatbelt a few times a month is likely to kill you. Perhaps people who are negative are merely unlucky, and people who are positive, are positive because they are lucky, and it is has nothing to do with thought patterns, rather, the bad energy that surrounds certain people creates their negative personality. I've gone through horrible trauma, and it started while I was still a very positive person. Things just always worked out for me. Then one day it all just stopped and nothing seemed to work out. We are, right now, on the edge of a financial collapse. Shall all the positive thinkers just ignore it and not protect themselves? Many times people who are "positive" are just extremely advantaged either through genetics or affirmative action, and just don't see it, and don't understand fully what it is like to live on the other side of the tracks. One thing I won't do is give up. I constantly study and I will fight for what I want. Go read German history, 1918-1945, it might sober you "positive thinkers" or shall I say "naives" up a bit. Perhaps you are confusing mean people with negative people.

Let’s face it, pick up a history book, human history has been filled with war, famine, disease and death, as well as joy, love, success, honor and happiness. Still, given the brutality of nature (try living in nature for one month in the winter), it only stand to reason that one has to be a realist to survive.

What you are talking about is an unhealthy focus on what is not real. It is reality that if you go to war you may die. It is not reality that driving around without your seatbelt a few times a month is likely to kill you.

Perhaps people who are negative are merely unlucky, and people who are positive, are positive because they are lucky, and it is has nothing to do with thought patterns, rather, the bad energy that surrounds certain people creates their negative personality.

I’ve gone through horrible trauma, and it started while I was still a very positive person. Things just always worked out for me. Then one day it all just stopped and nothing seemed to work out.

We are, right now, on the edge of a financial collapse. Shall all the positive thinkers just ignore it and not protect themselves?

Many times people who are “positive” are just extremely advantaged either through genetics or affirmative action, and just don’t see it, and don’t understand fully what it is like to live on the other side of the tracks.

One thing I won’t do is give up. I constantly study and I will fight for what I want.

Go read German history, 1918-1945, it might sober you “positive thinkers” or shall I say “naives” up a bit.

]]> By: mary http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-56037 mary Fri, 06 Jun 2008 06:48:55 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-56037 Hey, I like your article. The only thing is that I used to be and am still in the process of not becoming one of those people. I don't want to feel sorry for myself, but I went through some incredibly traumatic life events and truly didn't notice my negative thought patterns setting in as I failed to cope with the events around me. I've done so well my whole life taking these issues and turning them in to a chance for me to grow and have the opportunity to be a strong resilient person, but I don't know when I gave up. I guess I felt like I needed a break and took the easy way out. I don't excuse any of this. I just think that it is important to remember that these people aren't necessarily out to get you and bring you down. They are clueless and aren't even aware of their toxic and somber mood. Everyone thinks that their thought patterns are reality and positivity is a direction that everyone should want to head. What kills me though is that as I became such a negative person, it happened slowly and I was completely unaware! Honestly. I've always wanted to make a positive impact on my surroundings, still kept up volunteer work and things like that, but I didn't realize how bad my sarcasm had gotten and how unpleasant I was to people around me. I thought I was joking and my sarcasm was a reflection of my own self-loathing. Truly didn't know. No one seemed to really want to hang out with me and I didn't know why. I just think it is important to consider telling people that they are not pleasant to be around before refering to them as leeches or as someone who is out to get you. I never intended to do that to anyone and felt as though my reality was everyone elses at the time. It took me so long to finally realize why people didn't like me and I have to thank a couple of people I worked with who were blunt and told me flat out... you're so negative and you're unpleasant to be around. While it hurts to hear, it is one of the best things someone has done for me, because they made it very clear as to why they didn't like me and look! it turned out positive. That's all it took for me to want to change! It sounds kind of silly, but maybe have something positive to say about these negative people. Every human being has the potential to change. Don't encourage it in any way. Call them out on it, but their thought patterns don't necessarily imply that they are bad people and out to harm you. Telling them that they are negative may make them upset at first (negative thoughts can lead someone to be highly sensitive or vice versa), but I think that it is such a good thing to do for the person and helps you in a sense impact the world in a positive way! Maybe don't completely shun them as horrible people, but tell them they are negative and you don't like it and maybe they will realize and change like me. Hey, I like your article. The only thing is that I used to be and am still in the process of not becoming one of those people. I don’t want to feel sorry for myself, but I went through some incredibly traumatic life events and truly didn’t notice my negative thought patterns setting in as I failed to cope with the events around me. I’ve done so well my whole life taking these issues and turning them in to a chance for me to grow and have the opportunity to be a strong resilient person, but I don’t know when I gave up. I guess I felt like I needed a break and took the easy way out. I don’t excuse any of this. I just think that it is important to remember that these people aren’t necessarily out to get you and bring you down. They are clueless and aren’t even aware of their toxic and somber mood. Everyone thinks that their thought patterns are reality and positivity is a direction that everyone should want to head. What kills me though is that as I became such a negative person, it happened slowly and I was completely unaware! Honestly. I’ve always wanted to make a positive impact on my surroundings, still kept up volunteer work and things like that, but I didn’t realize how bad my sarcasm had gotten and how unpleasant I was to people around me. I thought I was joking and my sarcasm was a reflection of my own self-loathing. Truly didn’t know. No one seemed to really want to hang out with me and I didn’t know why. I just think it is important to consider telling people that they are not pleasant to be around before refering to them as leeches or as someone who is out to get you. I never intended to do that to anyone and felt as though my reality was everyone elses at the time. It took me so long to finally realize why people didn’t like me and I have to thank a couple of people I worked with who were blunt and told me flat out… you’re so negative and you’re unpleasant to be around. While it hurts to hear, it is one of the best things someone has done for me, because they made it very clear as to why they didn’t like me and look! it turned out positive. That’s all it took for me to want to change! It sounds kind of silly, but maybe have something positive to say about these negative people. Every human being has the potential to change. Don’t encourage it in any way. Call them out on it, but their thought patterns don’t necessarily imply that they are bad people and out to harm you. Telling them that they are negative may make them upset at first (negative thoughts can lead someone to be highly sensitive or vice versa), but I think that it is such a good thing to do for the person and helps you in a sense impact the world in a positive way! Maybe don’t completely shun them as horrible people, but tell them they are negative and you don’t like it and maybe they will realize and change like me.

]]> By: Priya Florence Shah http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-34443 Priya Florence Shah Mon, 19 Nov 2007 16:24:31 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-34443 Lisa, what I suggest is that you begin to distance yourself from the friend who judges you. Or else realise that she's being judgmental because she is unable to accept her own failings and judges herself harshly. Either way, it's up to you to decide whether you want to tolerate her judgment or enlighten her on her behaviour (which I doubt will work). Lisa, what I suggest is that you begin to distance yourself from the friend who judges you. Or else realise that she’s being judgmental because she is unable to accept her own failings and judges herself harshly. Either way, it’s up to you to decide whether you want to tolerate her judgment or enlighten her on her behaviour (which I doubt will work).

]]> By: tata http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-25331 tata Sat, 28 Jul 2007 16:56:11 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-25331 nice one and point weell made, all negative bodd sucking vampires and leeches are no good to any one not even themselves the prey on the goodness of people who genuinly make an effort in life and with other people. these negative dark clouds only bring wet weather showering all that they are around so that you will always end up getting wet, cold and eventually sick. good advice avoid these people like the plague they are a disease on the earth that which is making it so much more difficult for all human kind and reaking havoc on the world. keep poisitive and dont let these gloomy people cloud your mind and life, where you want to sail happily in the sun they only want to anchor your ship at any time with out need. keep sailing! nice one and point weell made, all negative bodd sucking vampires and leeches are no good to any one not even themselves the prey on the goodness of people who genuinly make an effort in life and with other people. these negative dark clouds only bring wet weather showering all that they are around so that you will always end up getting wet, cold and eventually sick. good advice avoid these people like the plague they are a disease on the earth that which is making it so much more difficult for all human kind and reaking havoc on the world. keep poisitive and dont let these gloomy people cloud your mind and life, where you want to sail happily in the sun they only want to anchor your ship at any time with out need. keep sailing!

]]> By: gnap http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-20951 gnap Sun, 06 May 2007 05:28:36 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-20951 Hey, great article. I stumbled upon your site when i was searching for something to read on "negative people". I recently encountered some negative people that left a bad taste in my mouth, and what I read here, made me feel a whole lot better - seeing them for what they really are and keeping a clear conscience for myself and not be affected by them. You're right. Avoid them like the plaque. (If i can't avoid them, I'll just IGNORE them. :) ) Thanks.. :) Hey, great article. I stumbled upon your site when i was searching for something to read on “negative people”.

I recently encountered some negative people that left a bad taste in my mouth, and what I read here, made me feel a whole lot better - seeing them for what they really are and keeping a clear conscience for myself and not be affected by them.

You’re right. Avoid them like the plaque. (If i can’t avoid them, I’ll just IGNORE them. :) )

Thanks.. :)

]]> By: Soul Kadee: An Appetite for Life » The Law Of Attraction Is No Secret http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-14005 Soul Kadee: An Appetite for Life » The Law Of Attraction Is No Secret Sun, 04 Mar 2007 13:04:34 +0000 http://www.soulkadee.com/2006/04/25/why-i-avoid-negative-people-like-the-plague/#comment-14005 [...] Lack of belief: Negative beliefs, defeatist attitudes, pessimism and expecting the worst only attracts more negativity into your life [...] […] Lack of belief: Negative beliefs, defeatist attitudes, pessimism and expecting the worst only attracts more negativity into your life […]

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