Natural Born Empath: Deanna Troi In The Flesh
July 5th, 2006, 9:03 am by Priya Florence Shah
Filed under Events, Self Help, Self-Awareness, Attraction, Empathy, Meditation, My Life, Personal Growth, Spirituality, Relationships, Self-Improvement, Attitude, Experiences, Thoughts
I never really liked Deanna Troi, the empath in Star Trek, but I just discovered that I have more in common with her than I thought. I scored 100% on this sensitivity quiz that told me I’m a natural born empath.
Not that I was surprised by the discovery. I’ve always known I was extremely sensitive. My mom comes from a family of highly sensitive people that my Dad politely describes as “high-strung.”
But now I have a word to describe that uncomfortable feeling of being “different.” And I know it’s not a disease, but a gift. And even though it comes at a high price, that realisation has made a whole bunch of things fall in place for me.
The word “empathy” derives from the Greek words “empatheia” meaning “passion” and “pathein” meaning “to experience, suffer”.
According to Miriam-Webster’s on-line dictionary - “Empathy is the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner.”
Most empaths are more attuned to emotions than thoughts. To be an emotional empath is to experience the emotions of others - the positive and negative - pain and suffering and as well as love and compassion.
As a child I knew I had difficulty disconnecting from the emotions of people, even if they were only fictional characters who inhabited the world of movies and books.
When I was in school, I would cry if one of my siblings got hurt. As a mom, I shed tears every time my tiny, colicky daughter screamed in pain, when gas bloated her little belly.
I can sob uncontrollably when I see or hear about an act of cruelty, as I did when I read about the horrible woman who brutalised and tortured a 10-year old girl to death. I could almost feel the pain the poor, helpless child suffered before she died.
It made me sick to my stomach. I simply cannot comprehend the mindset of people like that. Especially since the perpetrator had three daughters of her own.
I guess being an empath is what accounts for my acute sensitivity to negative thoughts, negative people, bad news, and even depression. But at least I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. As the article here notes:
Empaths are sensitive to TV, videos, movies, news and broadcasts. Violence or emotional dramas depicting shocking scenes of physical or emotional pain inflicted on adults, children or animals can bring an empath easily to tears. At times, they may feel physically ill or choke back the tears. Some empaths will struggle to comprehend any such cruelty, and will have grave difficulty in expressing themselves in the face of another’s ignorance, closed-mindedness and obvious lack of compassion. They simply cannot justify the suffering they feel and see.
But empathy also gives me the ability to connect to people, the compassion to see things from their point of view, and ability to build rapport almost instantly, traits that have served me well in my personal and professional life.
It accounts for my natural desire to nurture people around me, be a healer and caregiver, and for my interest in healing arts like Reiki and Tai Chi.
It also gives me the ability to be open and share my experiences on this blog, show spontaneous warmth and affection to people I barely know, express my creativity in writing and music, love animals, Nature, and cherish my space and solitude (sometimes to the point of becoming a recluse).
As most empaths know, the gift can be a double-edged sword. We can get so swept up in the emotions of others that we lose sight of our own boundaries, and forget to care for our own needs. Although we may have many friends, we tend to form “close” friendships only with people we feel safe with.
But knowing the truth of who you are can be very empowering, if a little scary. At least I know there are ways to deal with the downside of being an empath.
Regular meditation has helped me get centered, ground my energy, and get in touch with my inner self. And there are always ways I can protect myself from being overwhelmed by other people’s energy. My energy healer friends have been teaching me these techniques for a while now.
If you’re an empath or have special abilities, do share your experience here. I’d love to hear from you. But then you already knew that, didn’t you?
Resources:
Empowered by Empathy : 25 Ways to Fly in Spirit
Recognizing Empathy in Yourself
The Empath: The Fourth Chakra Dominant Individual
Essential Practices For Empaths
The Highly Sensitive Child : Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them
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Laura Ing said,
October 26th, 2006, 12:25 am
Thank you for telling my story. All my life I’ve known I was different. I spent most of my life being confused, not understanding why other people didn’t seem to feel things as deeply as I did. Even my parents would tease me for crying so much.
I wish there was more information out there about Empaths. I’m just glad that I’ve finally found that there are others like me. Its not quite so lonely anymore.
Thank you.
Megan W. said,
February 10th, 2008, 11:44 pm
I think this is very interesting because it explains me almost perfectly. I feel this way and I never knew that it had a term that went with it. Although I am happy to be empathetic to people, it has caused me some problems because I get hurt easily when people say things and I take them to heart. Does anyone have any suggestions as to what would be a good idea to not let things get to me so much? It would be much appreciated. Thanks and thank you for the article. It was very interesting.