Soul Kadee

The Tacky World Of Full-time Victims

Copyright © Vulcanmind

There is a certain class of people who have jinxed all possibilities of a fruitful and satisfying love life. There is no hope for them in terms of full-fledged relationships – they lack the necessary equipment and are limited to bouncing from one futile rebound caper to another – and to a series of breakups and one-night stands.

They are the victims – the ones whose loves lives are little more than self-fulfilling prophesies of doom. At a subconscious level, they have judged themselves to be flawed. For whatever reason, they do not see themselves as anything worth relating to, falling in love with and cherishing. It may be because their parents told them they are useless; it may be because they have chronic sexual performance anxiety; it may be because they are the ignored younger siblings of a sexpot sister or hunky brother; it may be because they simply have no life. Whatever the reason is, they do not see a love relationship as a desirable destination – the only thing that fascinates them is the dubious pleasure of a perilous journey down a thorn-raddled road.

Such as state of self is, of course, an untenable thing to allow to percolate into complete awareness. One likes to believe, after all, that one is basically better than everyone else, only misunderstood – a gem consistently mistaken to be an ugly piece of rock. We can’t have ourselves owning up to the fact that we are somehow at FAULT, now can we? After all, we have to live with ourselves even if nobody else wants to. We have to look in that mirror and see someone we can respect, don’t we?

No, we can’t. And even though we know for a fact (deep down there where there’s no escape from the truth) that our current outlook on life has rendered us mangled goods, we got to go through the motions of getting into a relationship, now don’t we? After all, all life’s a stage, we’re all actors on it and EVERYONE’S WATCHING TO SEE HOW WE PERFORM, right? Nobody has anything better to do, right?

Also, there’s this yammering little aspect down there below the belt that won’t shut up no matter HOW much we tell it that it’s no use, that it’s just gonna have to starve to death ‘cause Daddy/Mommy doesn’t have what it takes to provide. Yessir, it’s the good old human sex drive – and no, it won’t shut up. The sex drive is a brainless thing and doesn’t care about any conflicts between what you are, your self-perception and the way people actually react to you. It just says “GIMME” and sure enough, there you go… looking for a relationship you have already condemned to death even before it is born.

When a victim gets into a relationship, everything seems fine and dandy in the beginning. The unsuspecting partner often does sense something sinister squirming below the surface, but usually passes it off as a very understandable nervous reaction to his/her patented sex appeal (my dad used to tell me of the perfect business model – buy someone for what he’s worth and sell him for what he THINKS he’s worth, and you’ll ALWAYS make a profit.)

Two months down the line, both the victim and the victim’s victim have a situation. The victim has his/her true act onstage by then – the act of a self-perceived loser trying to justify yet another loss by putting the blame of the rapidly unraveling situation on the other. The victim’s victim is spending a large chunk off time fending of inexplicable arrows dispatched from inexplicable positions in true guerilla style. The victim’s victim has probably gone through a period of serious self-doubt by then – “Am I really such a bastard / bitch?”, “Were those really my intentions?”

More often than not, the victim’s victim has a better perception of himself/herself than the victim, and eventually tells the victim to take his/her pitiful martyr act and shove it where the sun doesn’t shine. Bingo, alone again. “The prophecy has been fulfilled once more, Lawd – how could I ever doubt you? I will NEVER question your will for me again – and I know your will is that I spend my life miserable and alone.”

For such people, repeatedly generated abstinence from everything that makes life worth living, finally becomes not only a necessity, but a virtue of some kind. “Here I am on my cross, crucified for the sins of than sonofabitch / bitch who doesn’t know how to treat a woman / man right. This is my purpose in life. This is what I born for. Look upon me, all you sinners – see how you made the innocent, blameless suffer.”

I am reminded of a phenomenon that the media have observed here in India – that of professional refugees. India is a largish piece of real estate that is prone to all sorts of natural disasters. In fact, because political greed eats into a large chunk of funds allotted to technological safeguards, it is prone to man-made disasters as well. Fairly spectacular shit hits the fan every now and then – tsunamis, earthquakes, gas leaks, communal riots, you name it, we have it on our calendar this year. Of course, whatever Government happens to be top dog at these times announces that it is dispensing relief to the victims.

Well, certain reporters have noted the fact that the many familiar faces seem to turn up at each disaster site, just in time to lap up the Government goodies. These are professional refugees who keep track of such events and make sure they’re there to stand up and be counted.

What has that got to do with our relationship victims, you ask? Plenty. There’s a payoff for being a doomed love martyr – you get to wallow in loads of self-pity, can absolve yourself of many of the activities of daily living because you are ‘depressed’, and have a ready catchment of like-minded wet ends who will gladly sit down to wail with you that all men are bastards / all women are bitches.

Vulcanmind is one of us, but he doesn’t see much point in confessing to that fact. Forever amazed at the human condition, yet never despairing - it sure makes for an interesting case study…

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Yup, I’ve been OD-ing on the Star Wars series this weekend. I love George Lucas and his Jedi philosophy, inspired as it was by Eastern spiritual tradition, including Taoist philosophy and Qigong energy practices.

But, some of the episodes reminded me so much of another George - the President everyone loves to hate €œ and the world he is responsible for creating, that I just had to share the 5 reasons I think George Bush is a Sith Lord - Darth Invader.

1. He thinks in absolutes.

Only a Sith thinks in absolutes, said Obi-Wan Kenobi when Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader warned, If you’re not with me, then you’re my enemy, in Part III: Revenge of the Sith. Reminds us so much of G.W.’s famous Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists, proclamation.

2. He acts from fear and revenge.

The Jedi act from compassion and love. The Sith use fear and hate to drive them. Notice how everything G.W. does is in reaction to fear or revenge. Revenge for what Saddam did to Daddy. Fear of being attacked. Fear of seeming weak. Fear of those who are different. Too bad he has no fear of looking like an idiot.

3. He uses deceit to achieve his ends.

The Sith are no strangers to deceit, hiding their true motives behind seemingly good intentions. Chancellor Palpatine hid his identity as a Sith Lord, to wipe out the Jedi and overthrow the Republic. Bush’s search for the still-missing Weapons of Mass Destruction turned out to be just as much of a red herring, and his War on Terror is just another attempt to pull the wool over our eyes. Paul Craig Roberts offers his take on this in Is Bush A Sith Lord?

4. His idea of fun is to invade other countries without reason.

The Sith invade, take over or wipe out other planets, for no reason, other than the fact that they don’t kowtow to the Empire. Bush’s ego and pride have brought Iraq to the brink of civil war, threatened Iran, North Korea and anyone else who dared question American Imperial Rule.

5. He has a warped sense of justice.

The Jedi code - and any civilised society - mandates that an adversary must stand fair trial before justice is carried out. But Bush used a kangaroo court to hang his old foe, Saddam Hussein. Fair trial? Oh nooo! That would have exposed far too many skeletons in the CIA’s closet.

Given more time, I’m sure I could come up with many more parallels between G.W. and the Dark Side Of The Force. Instead I’ll leave you with this video that left many of us wondering why Bush is holding the green lightsaber instead of the red one.

Tags: Star Wars, george lucas revenge of the sith jedi sith lightsaber anakin skywalker Dark Side Of The Force George Bush iraq iraq war on terror iran

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I really loved this article by Samantha Stevens. It made me laugh and brought home a few truths about the stupid beliefs we new-agers sometimes have about the people we call “soulmates.”

Lately, I think people are investing too much energy in the idea that they “must find their soulmate.” Where do we get this idea that we are somehow not complete unless we are connected to another person? What are you? An electrical outlet waiting for a plug, so you can finally light up the world?

Frankly, when I hear the word “soulmate” I tend to give a little shudder, especially when I think about some of the people in my past that I have considered to be my soulmates. Quite frankly, most of my soulmates were idiots! The Buddha would say that they were also my teachers — people I have known in a previous life time who have come back in this lifetime to teach me a lesson.

Boy did they, but unfortunately, it sometimes takes several soul mates to teach us just one lesson. (Hint, hint — I think the lesson is supposed to be about “letting go” and stop trying to control, or own people — a common problem in this society.)

Most people think that they have found their soulmate just because they feel a strong connection to a person. Unfortunately, that connection may not have anything to do with spirituality at all. It is amazing how lust can convince us that we are spiritually connected to a person. The person may just seem familiar, because they remind you of an ex boyfriend, a parent, or even someone who molested you as a child.

I also hate the way the term soulmate is often used by people as an excuse to stay in a relationship where they are clearly being abused …half the time the abuser is using the concept of the soulmate as blackmail: “but you have to take this crap from me! You’re beholden to me. I knew you in another life!”

You can tell your soulmate is an idiot, if he left you eight months ago and you feel like he is still hanging around in your aura, or even worse, visiting you in dreams, or plaguing you with unwanted thoughts like “this was really all your fault, you know.” Time to evict this tenant from your cosmic field.

When it comes to soulmates, I subscribe to Oprah’s theory “that everybody is your soul mate.” In theory, you don’t have to have sex with every soul mate you meet — a soul mate can also be a child, a relative, a co-worker or even just a good friend.

One of the hazards of getting involved sexually and emotionally with someone who we believe was sent to us by God, or who we think was sent to us as “an angel on earth” is that we often become over attached to them and have trouble severing the connection.

Notice how anyone you’ve gotten rid off doesn’t qualify as a soulmate… but anyone who dumped you automatically ALWAYS makes the grade … ironically, you hear most people describe the last person who dumped them as their one and only soulmate.

If they were such a great soulmate, then why didn’t they stick around to build a future with you? Oh right, your soulmate was an idiot, too. It’s O.K. to admit your soulmate is an idiot, by the way. It makes the angels laugh …

Forget meditation. There’s nothing that dissolves bad karma faster than a bit of humour.

Samantha Steven’s articles have been published in many high-standing newspapers and she has published several books. If you wish to buy Samantha’s books about metaphysics click here http://www.insomniacpress.com/author.php?id=110 You can meet Samantha Stevens at http://www.psychicrealm.com where she works as a professional psychic. You can also read more of her articles at http://www.newagenotebook.com

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My friend, Lois Carter Fay, writes at BoomerWomenBlog and posted this hilarious story that I want to share with you because it really made me laugh.

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. Why? my daughter asked.

Because it’s been on the ground, you don’t know where it’s been, it’s dirty and probably has germs I replied.

At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, Mommy, how do you know all this stuff? You are so smart.

I was thinking quickly. All moms know this stuff. It’s on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don’t let you be a Mommy.

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information. OH¦I get it! she beamed, So if you don’t pass the test you have to be the daddy.

Exactly, I replied back with a big smile on my face.

~Lois

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